i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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