i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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