Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
