I got chris browned last night
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
