It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
