Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
How does it feel to date your dad?
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
