So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
