apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
