Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
