This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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