There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
