WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
