have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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