Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
