If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
