she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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