I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
