I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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