She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Randomize
