Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
