Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Randomize
