Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize