We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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