It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
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