I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
