Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
As shirtless as possible
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
