Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
