I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
There's even glitter on my cock...
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