it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
