Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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