i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
its not stalking. its research.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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