it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
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