If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
