i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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