I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
and she was petting her beer can
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
