i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
