ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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