just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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