let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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