My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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