she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
this will be a night to untag.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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