alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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