try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
