Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
