There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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