i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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