Umm I'm too high to move.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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