Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Randomize
