At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
You ate ashes out of my bong
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Randomize
