We won't sleep together?
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
We don't watch enough power rangers
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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